Chapter 1- Who am I?!

A literal and rhetorical question.

The who I was when we arrived at the gates of JFK one last time from Spain, that last definate flight. The one that changed the course of my humble little Spanish life forever.

My grandparents, one of the biggest part of my life was left behind, friends I was finally developing, somewhat solid relationships, with at the age of 10, they stayed behind.

I left with a proud head on my shoulders, I was going to have a life unlike any of them would ever know. I was going to America.

I was positive, optimistic, ready for anything, and it was all going to be great.

We all have visions, plans, some more naive than others. It wasn’t so great, it was hard. Sad days are the ones a ten year old has to live, in an unknown land, with an unknown language. Try being a ten year old with the communication skills of a two year old. You want to say something but you don’t know what or how. I was from a completely different culture, one who accepts “beep,beep” as a form of communication instead of excuse me.

I was a silly ten year old, who didn’t know how to be silly in this new world.

Awkward stage after awkward stage, trying to keep the faith, positive thinking lead me into my dark teenage years. I wore 22inch JnCos and had a bad ass cross around my neck. I was getting nowhere with the towns people in high school so I made my own crowd. I was a poetic, passionate artist not giving a crap, all whilst maintaining my possitive loving self.

Who am I?

I was everything I though I should be. I never really knew who I was, always looking for best friends and happy loves all whilst being afraid to commit to anything just in case it left me somehow.

I was everyone’s friends and no ones only friend. I don’t know why, I’m sure someone somewhere with a license and a knack for this sort of thing would know.

I never did understand, as I am slowly now, that it takes times to know the who in I AM. I was dependent on my parents a lot, for guidance, my culture clashed with this culture and I am still pulling

myself into myself. I am a passionate, loving, caring, compassionate, love loving person. I was naive at times, and I can get carried away with my imagination of what it would be. I have a fear of being alone and being left behind….all this and a little more have lead me to where I am today.

I can say, that I am still growing, I have made some crazy decisions, at the age of 32 I am a struggling artist, trying o get into the health care world to love and uplift the broken, I am a happy mother of two little boys, and a divorced woman victim to her own heart and to her own fears and hopes.

This is the first chapter that began long a go that encompasses the little I know and the much I have learned.

Your lesson:

1. Always remember where you’ve come from

2. Where are you going?

3. Always love as if it was the last time

4. Keep the faith in the journey and listen

5. Have no regrets

6. Have compassion

7. Try and not overthink, try to analyze, if there is a solution and it’s the only on, MAKE IT

8. Listen

9. Love

10. Be patient and TRUST the JOURNEY

#enlighten #trust #growth #self #mantra #Inspired #journey